How To Be Gay: Coming Out
Coming out to your friends and family can be one of the scariest things to a young gay person. Everyone has different situations, so there isn’t always going to be just one answer for every person. You need to start by thinking about how your parents will actually react when they find out you’re gay.
Sometimes it can be hard to imagine your parents reaction when you tell them. A common situation is parents who are extremely religious and therefor don’t agree with homosexuality. If this is the case, you are the only one who would even have a clue to how they will react. If you have a close friend that you are out to and know your parents, ask them for their opinion. Not all religious parents are going to flip shit when their son tells them they are a screaming queen, unfortunately we all can’t be that lucky.
If you are truly truly concerned about getting a negative reaction, a good idea might be to write them a letter. This way you can completely express all your feelings and they have no choice but to hear you out. This will also give them time to reflect on what you have said in the letter and allow them to simmer down by the time you come together and talk about it.
I can honestly say that 90% of my friends had a good coming out experience. Of course there are those few that got kicked out and had to crash at or friends places until they got on their feet. You just need to analyse your own situation and try to figure out just how your parents would act. Most of us are going to be thinking the absolute worst case scenario, which hopefully won’t even happen.
So I say if you are in a situation where you are able to come out and things will be fine, or even a little rocky….it’s worth it. Coming out changes your life. You no longer have to hide your true self in fear of “giving it away”. It allows you to do whatever you want without feeling awkward about it. Then you get introduced to the gay life by other gay friends you meet and you just have so much fun.
There is an entire gay world out there that you’re missing out on if you don’t come out to your family and friends. In short, if you aren’t out and proud, you’re not living your life to the fullest.
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If you are able to come out, it will change your life. Don’t wait, coming out now could be your answer…
How to come out of the closet
This is a very tough topic to write about. Everyone has specific situations where one piece of advice may not be the best for them, but the best for someone else trying to come out of the closet. Coming out can be one of the most stressful things anyone could experience. You are literally dying inside wanting people to know, but at the same time you don’t want to be rejected by your family and friends.
Coming out to your parents
There are all sorts of factors that put kids coming out in different situations according to their parents beliefs. If your mother or father are very religious, it can almost be assumed that they aren’t going to take you coming out as gay very well.
Although in my situation, my mother is very religious and she is just about okay with it as it gets. I must admit she did pull the bible card as the first thing when I did come out. After we talked about it for a second, everything was fine. I had to explain to her that I truly did not choose to be this way, and she was completely on my side – then mentioned wanting to put me on a gay dating website.
Unfortunately ALL situations can’t go that well. You really have to judge your parents reactions for yourself. If they are religious, will coming out be completely unacceptable to them?
If you KNOW that your parents won’t be okay with you coming out and telling them you’re gay, you probably shouldn’t. Wait until you are living a life where you don’t depend on them for anything, then they can’t make your life complete hell.
Why I recommend coming out if you have the opportunity
I knew I was gay since early elementary school. I really wished I would have just come out with it then instead of waiting until I was 19. The reason being is as soon as I did come out my entire life changed. I was free to be myself and do things openly that I would usually have to hide. I actually got involved in the gay community and made some amazing friends that I still have to this day. With those friends I experienced the gay life, and we had an absolute blast. Coming out is a life changing experience, which is why I say the earlier you can do it, the better.